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Like when someone calls you up and says "Oh, I'm sorry, did I wake you up?" And you lie and assure them no, you're always up at 3:30 am on a weekday. Why do we do that? Are you afraid of offending someone who just dragged you out of bed to tell you that episode of "I Love Lucy" that you like is on. I do it myself, and I have no idea why.
Then there's the people who don't want to admit that they didn't
Or, soaking of the person who can't admit they're setting what about people don't want to admit they don't know something, but are so obvious that they must be doing it in purpose. I used to work with this one woman who anytime she got a question answered, would say "I already knew that, I just wanted to see if you knew." She'd say it with a smile like she was kidding, but if you pressed her, she would insist that she already knew.
Then there was this guy who called my phone and asked to speak to someone who wasn't me, let's call him Phil.
"You have the wrong number," I said.
"No, I don't," he said. The implication seemed to be that he didn't dial the wrong number, I had the wrong phone.
"Yes, you have," I said.
"Are you sure Phil's not there?"
I assured him I was positive, that I didn't even know anyone named Phil.
"Look," he said, "Can you just ask if Phil is there?"
I said "I'm the only one in this car."
He muttered something unflattering about me and hung up.
I read somewhere that people tend to view situations as the result of personality traits in others, but with themselves they consider the circumstances. For instance, if someone is rude to me on the phone for reasons beyond my control, like in the above example, I think that guy is a jerk. But if I was the one venting my spleen on someone who didn't deserve it, I'd say "Well, I've been having a rough week, what with my car breaking down and all the trouble I've been having at work..."
Ever since I read that, I've tried to be more understanding of other people. If someone cuz me if in traffic, I tell myself maybe he didn't see me or is in a hurry for a perfectly good reason, rather than assuming he's a reprehensible pile of filth.
It didn't so me from cursing him out when it happens, though.
-Long days and pleasant nights
